Birthdays

The twins are 1 today!! What a year we've had. Thinking back a year ago, was not the best time in our life. Lilly had been causing problems with the pregnancy for a couple months. I had been to countless doctor appts to check on her progress and growth. They had figured out that she had a cord problem, where the cord doesn't insert fully into the placenta so that it doesn't allow her to get as much circulation from the placenta as she needed to fully grow. Alex was doing great. He was actually a nice size baby for me, and Lilly had been doing good until about 24 weeks. We will never forget that last appt with the MFM specialist. It was the monday before they were born. I had told Chris it was ok for him to go back to Canada to work, I just knew Lilly had grown, because I had gained weight and was so sure everything was going to be good for another 2 weeks. Thank goodness he didn't go back yet. I could tell once the ultrasound started that she hadn't grown at all and the bloodflow through the cord wasn't doing as good. The doctor recommended that we deliver, that if we waited, bloodflow to Lilly could stop and at this point nothing good would come from keeping her in any longer. I was devastated. The MFM called my OB and arranged for a c-section for that Friday. My ob was so nice to come deliver me at a hospital where he doesn't work. As a L&D nurse, I knew way too much to expect. I knew what obstacles the babies were going to be faced with and that was the hardest thing to do to go deliver my babies knowing what they were to be faced with. I had prayed for the babies for so long, and now the day was here. I was hoping to get a few more weeks, but 32 weeks was much farther than I thought I was going to get when I left Canada at 26 1/2 weeks. Their prognosis would have been much different at that time.

Friday came too fast. Although, I was happy to get to the hospital and hear Lilly's heartbeat. I had been fearful everytime that something was going to happen to her and we would have waited too long each visit. Chris and I got to the hospital that morning. Mom and Dad, Mary and Anne were also there with us. Jess came into town the night before and she and Blake were taking care of Julian that day. It was so nice to have them there with us for support. The babies were born at 11:05 and 11:07 am. It was such a relief to hear them cry when the came out. They were wisked away and my nurse kept giving us updates. We won't forget them saying Lilly was mad and giving the nurses a hard time, that she was such a little fighter at 2lb 5 oz. Alex was a different story. He weighed 3lb 11 oz, but apgars were 5 and 7. He looked pale and had little tone when I saw him. They just let me take a pick before they took them to the NICU.

I was told they had to intubate Alex and give him surfactant because he was having a hard time breathing. They had to leave him on the ventalator. Lilly was on CPAP and doing pretty good. It was going to be a long 7 weeks to come and many obstacles to face. We had to first hurdle Alex's severely premature lungs, and pneumonia on top of that. He looked so sick and frail it hurt me to have him deal with that. For so long we would come in and just focus on Alex because he was in a worst state of health and everyone would would into Lilly's isolete and be in amazement that she was breathing on her own and sooooo small. We dealt with the possibilities of brain bleeds, PIC line placements, multiple IV, umbilical lines, Ventalators, CPAP, feeding tubes, apnea spells (they would stop breathing and heartrate would drop), possibility of eyes not being developed, learning how to eat. On top of dealing with the babies, I had never left Julian for that amount of time. I felt terrible that I couldn't be the mom he was used to while I was busy with the babies. My mom stepped in as a substitute mom while I wasn't there for Julian and the babies. For 7 weeks, we would split our time. If I was with the babies she was with Julian and vice versa. I hated to have the babies at the hospital by themselves, so we tried to maximize the hours with everyone. Julian also went to "daycare" for the first time ever. I felt terrible about that. We had sacrificed so much so that he didn't have to be away from us, but I also knew he needed to have time to play with other kids while we were at Dee Dee's. Thank goodness he did enjoy it or I would have felt like a terrible mom. Slowly but surely the babies started to do better and were able to come home. I did a quick trip to babies R us and Target when they told me they could come home. I didn't have a singe thing for them. We never had a shower for them, or bought anything because of everything that went on during the pregnancy.

Now, a year later, I can't believe where we started from. The babies are doing wonderful. Other than Lilly's still very small, you would never know they were premature. Alex likes to eat which is very ironic because he had a very hard time learning how to suck a bottle. He would pass out every time he ate for a long time. Lilly has had her ups and downs, eating is still an issue but developmentally they are fantastic. They even do things they aren't suppose to be doing yet. Lilly is so smart and aware of her surroundings. She takes everything in and has become quite the mommy's girl. Alex loves to be held and just wants someone to meet all his needs. He loves to eat, and Alex loves watching Duke. I think that is going to be Lilly's first word. They both only have 2 teeth, Alex is trying to walk, Lilly is a great crawler. Lilly actually likes to eat McD's chicken nuggets. I don't know what I did to get such bad eaters. I think mom wished it on me since I was this way as a child. (ha).

I am so blessed to have 3 wonderful children. they make my life so happy and exciting. We are still hoping to get another year down, so that life is more manageable with twins.

Lilly right after she came out, before they took her to the NICU
1 year old
Alex in the NICU. On a vent, and having a difficult time with his lungs. Poor baby.

Lilly update

Just an update since we were sick:

Of course the last person I wanted to get sick and not eat for several days was Lilly. She lost about 1 lb. Doesn't sound like much to you or me, but for a little girl, that pound took 1 month to gain. Since she was sick she hasn't wanted to eat like before. Seems like we are back to where we started. (2 steps forward, 1 step back). The GI doctors increased her medicine to help her want to eat, and now we are eating our bottles better, but she still doesn't want any solid food. I feel like my whole life is spent around feeding people, Julian included. He isn't much of an eater either. I used to chase him around the house shoving food in his mouth. I'm sure lilly is going to be the same. thank goodness I have one child that will eat. You would not think that feeding someone could be such a difficult task, but it is a huge stressor in my life.

Our "feeding specialist" came by yesterday to see Lilly. It has been a while since she's been out since Lilly had been doing so good. She was so impressed by how Lilly is developmentally. She was shocked about how well she interacted. She said she acted more like a 18 month old, than a 11 month old. (Too bad she looks like a 6 month old). She thought Lilly may not have the mechanics yet of eating, but she does, she knows how to eat, just chooses not to. It's funny too, she will shake her head "no" at you when she is done eating. So, I will continue to try to find different foods she might like.

Today, we went to the Pediatric GI doctor to follow up from the hospital visit and since we have increased her meds. She thought she looked great too, from the first time we took her there. She weighed 16 lbs 1 oz today. She gained 12.5 gm/day since last visit. (That's almost 1/2 oz, which is almost where she should be- wonder what we would have had without the weight loss). She plotted her and when you adjust her age for her prematurity, she is actually in the 25% for weight and 20% for height. That's pretty good for my 2 lb baby. So, we did change her meds around a little more. The doctor said that after a GI virus, sometimes, GI motility slows down, so food doesn't empty as fast. She has been having more problems with her reflux, so we changed some things around to help. We will f/u in 3 weeks to see how things are going.

Lilly loves her bath and is a good picture taker for me.

Birthday weekend pictures

PaPa and Lilly
DeeDee and Alex
Daddy and Lilly
Julian getting off one of the big bouncy slides
Playing baseball

Jess and Julian sledding down backyard.


Birthday Boy!!!!

I don't know where to begin

It's been awhile, and I don't even know where to start, so I'll just go back a bit.

Feb 12, 2010 was my big boy's 6th birthday. I can't believe Julian is 6 already. I can still remember 6 years ago when I was still pregnant with him and his delivery. He was a handful as a baby, but I know he just didn't feel well. He has been the best child since then. He really doesn't give me any trouble. He is patient, kind, funny, loves to interact with people, sweet, and very smart. This year we planned a birthday party at a "jumpy gym" ( tons of inflatable bouncy castles and huge slides to play with). We invited his entire class in hopes that we could meet more people since it is freezing here and don't get out much with the babies. We had a good turn out, 10 of Julian's friends came. Julian loves his birthday and was so excited that the day was finally here. We had had a countdown all month. The day of Julian's birthday was a delay of school because of the snow, but he went to school anyway when it started so he could enjoy his special day. They get to wear a birthday crown. It was also valentine's day at school so they passed out their cards. That day, my sister Jess, also arrived while he was at school and he was so excited to see her when he got home. Then, Saturday was his party day. My mom and Dad came down to enjoy his big day. It was a busy day since I procrastinate and had to do all the favor things in the morning and pick up the cake. The kids had a ball though. It was even fun for the big kids who enjoyed going down the slides. It was nice to meet some of the other parents and see who the kids are Julian goes to school with. Then Mom, Dad, Jess and all of as came back home and had a great dinner and conversation.

Then Sunday came. I think this is when all of our problems started. A neighbor whose little girl is in Julian's kindergarten class called upset. Her family had had a GI virus all weekend and the husband had passed out in the shower and an ambulance was on the way to get him. She asked if I could take 2 of her girls. I had no choice, but knew they had some nasty virus going around. So the girls came over. I tried to keep them away from the babies, and then Jess and I lysoled everything when they left. We hoped for the best but got the worst.

Monday: Mary came up for a visit and to help watch the kids later in the week so I could go to Napa to meet Chris for a work trip and some much needed rest. We had a good day, it was nice to have company since Chris left this day for a long trip. Everything was normal until Julian woke me up at midnight after throwing up. We cleaned that up, and not much longer it happened again. He stayed home the next day with a fever and feeling tired and nauseous. Alex had also thrown up during the night and a couple times the next day.

Wednesday: Lilly threw up her night time and morning bottle. So it was her turn to get sick. Just the one I was hoping would avoid it due to her size and how hard it is to get her to gain weight. She had been eating great too. Then, I took Julian to the bus, feeling a little quessy. Then around 1:00 pm, it hit me hard. I started with vomiting and the diarrhea. ( I know too much info). It was really bad. I felt like I had been hit by a truck. I ached, was weak, could not stop, and had no energy. I told mom I needed to go somewhere and we found an urgent care center. We also took Lilly to be seen, since she hadn't kept anything down in 24 hrs. When we got there, my BP, pulse was awful. I couldn't even keep ice chips down. The doctor there recommended that I go to the hospital and recommended that they call an ambulance to come get me. They started an IV and gave me Zofran, and started to feel a little better. After several hours at the ER, 3 liters of fluid later and some more zofran, I was well enough to go home.

All I have to say is I'm glad my mom and mary were here. I don't know what I would have done if I had been home alone with the 3 kids. It could have been really bad.

Saturday: most of us are all better, but Lilly continues to throw up. I called her doctors who advised me to take her to ER for some IV fluids because she probably was dehydrated. so off I went with her. It was not a fun visit. But she did good, and I think felt much better after the zofran and fluids.

Thankfully, today we are all feeling better, and praying that we never get that again. It's bad when even the dog gets the virus in the house. Now, I just have to get lilly to gain the weight she lost over the last few days.

Pictures to follow

Lilly watching the Wiggles

I hate Mondays

My toothless big boy.
I found this shirt at Gymboree, very appropriate for Alex.
Taking a break from the snow.

I try not to be negative, but I really don't like Monday's. We always have a great time just spending time together on the weekends, and then it's back to being alone during the week to handle everything at the house. We had snow this past weekend, (Not near as much as our family in Philadelphia) but plenty for Julian to enjoy time outside. Daddy and Julian had a great time sledding down our hill in the back yard, making snowballs, and trying to make an igloo. It was nice to have a relaxing family weekend after the past week. It was a hard week last week. The babies and Julian had colds. They all had stuffy, runny noses. Tired and cranky kids. Then of course mommy had to get the cold as well. And of course when mommy is sick, daddy is always out of town. Julian missed 2 days of school, and then Friday didn't have school because of the impending snow coming, which was actually nice because he felt better, but was able to really rest and let the cold run it's course before he had to return to school this week. I new it was going to be too good to be true if we made it all winter without getting sick. For having a child in kindergarten around all those kids and 2 preemies, we've done pretty good though I have to say staying well. Let's see if we can make it the rest of the winter germ free.

Now, we're back to school, and Chris being busy all week. This job is really a lot more demanding of his time than any other in the past. I also miss having him work from home. It was a lot easier to get him to finish for the day when he was here, but he is doing good at work, and I'm here for the kids right now. Who knows what the future holds for us, but we're trying to make the most of this right now. it's just hard being all alone while he's busy.

They are calling for a lot more snow this week, so I'm sure Julian will have a snow day. It's funny trying to balance our experience from living in the south and in Canada. We are used to making life work even though it's snowing, yet things kind of shut down here like in the south. I used to take Julian to school in his snow suit, in pouring snow in Canada. And what's funny, they would still bundle up in snow gear and go out and play.

Hopefully this week will fly by. We have an exciting weekend to look forward to. I can't believe by big boy is turning 6 on Friday, and then we have a birthday party to celebrate. Looking forward to that and spending time with family.

Daddy giving Julian a good push to go down the hill.
Julian loves to make snow angels.

alex and duke